What Does Your Phone Case Say About You

We all carry a cell phone with us no matter where we go. It has become the most ubiquitous accessory in our lives. Every person is walking around with the same darkish or silver rectangle in their hands worth $1000+ dollars. This accessory has all of our sensitive information from credit card numbers, to bank passwords, to pictures that are not meant for anyone else’s viewing… yet we bring this incredibly valuable item around with us everywhere we go, and from the need to protect this item, a truly INSANE market of cell phone cases has emerged.

A cell phone case almost feels like a requirement at this point. You have to be a real baller to no-case an iPhone while walking down a crowded street. This industry has evolved into an enormous market of every case you could ever imagine… and today we will discuss what your case says about you.

MINIMAL/SKINNY CASE – You’re a purist. You like the slender and sleek design of your phone and you don’t want to cover it with some bulky disgusting case. You’re a risk taker because you know damn well those cases aren’t that sturdy.

OTTERBOX/LIFEPROOF – This one could almost be split into two different categories because you are either a legitimate construction worker or person who’s daily life actually requires the protection these cases offer… OR… you are a complete partier that has dropped their phone on the ground at the club, so many times that you just don’t want to pay to have your screen replaced again.

RUBBER ANIMAL – You know exactly what I’m talking about. You have a huge personality, no doubt! You don’t care that it will never fit in your pocket, because your phone looks like an elephant and that’s all that matters. You do you boo, we all live vicariously through you.

THE FOLD-OVER WALLET – You are all business, no fuss. Who needs a wallet when you already carry your phone with you everywhere you go. You’re ahead of the curve because eventually all of our money will be on our phones, and you’re just getting used to that now. Keep in mind, if you lose your phone, you lose everything.

ARTSY WOODEN CASE – You are a true fashionista. You want to transform your phone into a more natural presence in your life with wood tones. You don’t settle for cheap plastic you’re here for real art. These cases are hard to find, so you did your research, and you found one and you bought a couple to match all of your outfits, because dammit you care.

NO CASE – You’re a millionaire. That’s it. That’s the only person who can afford this lifestyle.

Any other case and you are either basic or trying too hard. Remember, even your phone says something about you to people you’ve never meant, so if you want your phone to be an elephant, you better know that we see it, we get it, and we have formed some opinions.